So there’s this guy, and he’s got a wife that’s a total loon, who he’s just about to send to the asylum. He also has a girlfriend that he’s madly in love with, a lady that he’s going to divorce his crazed wife for. One problem: the wife doesn’t like this at all, and attacks him, stabbing him in the eyes and permanently blinding him. They haul the wife off to a home to get treatment, the man gets his divorce, and promptly knocks up his lover. Another problem: she has been targeted by a local satanic cult and is supposed to deliver the son of Satan. The group perform weird ceremonies around her and kill anyone who might conflict with their plans for the child. The blinded man is kept in the dark (ha, ha) as the various evil machinations move around him. A nanny/nurse who looks like Ursa the Kryptonian villain from Superman II is assigned to aid the pregnant woman in her times of struggle, and she proceeds to kill nearly everyone associated with this family. A third problem: the crazy wife escapes the asylum and comes looking for more blood, but oddly is left quite alone by the ex-husband who insists she is harmless now (despite permanently blinding him). It gets more convoluted from there and to make things shorter and sweeter, there’s a lot of blood, a lot of murder, and the eventual, triumphant birth of the son of Satan!
I’m a big fan of satanic movies. Good, bad, ugly, fun, terrible, I don’t care. I especially like the occult horror films of the 70s. This is a Spanish film from 1982, so it’s decidedly on the downside of that run, but man, is it a wild one. Parts Rosemary’s Baby, parts The Omen, full of blood and guts and boobs and really strange plot twists, I would never say this is a “good” movie, but my God is it brilliant. Not much makes sense. The evil of the cult seems unstoppable, insurmountable. The cultists go around slashing throats that cause people to bleed barbecue sauce from their necks, they stare at something and an evil wind appears and things blow up, they raise a dead body to kill a meddling human, and they control this couple and their child, murdering anyone who gets in the way with zero repercussions. But then (SPOILER) the baby is born and the evil priest absconds with the son of Satan, and both are instantly killed just because they see a cross along the path where they are fleeing. Yes, you read that right. Also, the baby is obviously a doll (with tiny horns!) and as it goes up in flames, you can see someone from off-camera occasionally throwing gasoline on the burning, melting mess. Oh, and there’s a bat attack scene earlier in the movie where you can see all the wires. Literally, all of them. And yet despite this, the movie is charming as hell, and has more heart and pure guts than most “professional” horror films. Yeah, it’s not glossy and it’s got major flaws, but they really go for it when it comes to the blood, the terror, and the flesh.
I won’t call this a classic, but it’s damned close. Horror/cult cinema fans live for these kinds of movies, and they’re hard to find. Well, step right up, because this one is a doozy. You’ve got wanton throat slashing, exploding killer glass, big boobs swinging left and right, a punk ass kid that adds nothing to the plot but is very cool, blood, blood, blood, evil satanic priests, a crazed ex-wife with wild, roving eyes, and did I mention blood? Yes, all the ingredients are here for a hell of a good time. So dive in and discover this lost classic, if you haven’t already. Those that love this sort of thing will have a blast, and you know who you are.
★★★✮
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